Looking Forward

The Irish Hunger Memorial, Battery Park...the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend

The Irish Hunger Memorial, Battery Park…the Saturday of Memorial Day weekend

It’s been seven months since my last post about a breakup I was going through, and a very dark time in my life. I’ve been kind of hiding out since then and having all sorts of bad associations with my blog. Bad associations with my own blog! The blog I worked so hard to get going. The blog that was born of my getting laid off from work, which became a productive little way for me to spend my time, and get back to my writing and myself.

But really that’s not the whole story. I stayed away out of shame, because after writing my grand Breakup Manifesto—filled with heartache and despair and Gloria Gaynor-isms (I Will Survive!)—I wound up getting back together with my boyfriend. Yes, the one who withdrew and acted shady but didn’t have the decency to admit to me that something was “off.” The one I badmouthed and felt mistreated by. The one I twisted myself into a pretzel for to get back with…well guess what? It worked! I managed to milk another four months out of it.  Continue reading

Are You Breaking Up With Me?

I’m going through a breakup. Not the kind where you have a fight and he says, “Listen, I can’t do this anymore. It’s over.” And then you scream and yell, have makeup sex, text wars for days, then let’s-take-a-break’s, then more makeup sex. And then maybe after all that you do really break up or maybe you don’t. But no matter the outcome it’s fiery and dramatic and full of “Eff you”s (“No, eff you!”) And what you are is an active participant—an equal player who refuses to go down without a fight—all the while sporting an “Are-you-serious?” attitude. “You wanna give up all this?” (Sweeps hand up and down body). Continue reading

%d bloggers like this: